Thursday, March 6, 2008

Shitty

I've felt like shit for like a couple weeks now. I'm weak and shakey and hurt all over. So much phlegm. It's hard to swallow. Nothing tastes good. Not hungry. Wake up every hour or two hurting or having trouble breathing.

My mom came over the beginning of the week or the weekend or last week I don't remember. She brought hannah and spent quite a bit of time cleaning. My car broke down last tuesday so it was in the shop for a little over a week. Mom paid the $600 for the timing chain or whatever it was called.

Mom and all the kids came over today to pick me up to take me to get my car. Mom was furious cuz my livingroom is scattered and I have a few dishes in the sink and I never got rid of the rug she ruined by putting in the wash machine. it shreaded all over the place. it didnt help that both her and grandma were already md at me. I slept through the first phone call today from my mom. They got a thing from the dmv today saying it was a delinguency notice that I never sent in the registration for my car. Grandma swears I went and had my car smogged when she gave me the bill and i said i'd send it in. that never happened. that was a year ago when my car was smogged. it only gets smogged every other year. i don't remember getting the bill for the tags at all this year. Now I've got $110 bill for the tags that I have no idea how i'm going to pay. after i pay all my bills, and buy groceries i have barely enough for gas throughout the month...sometimes I don't even have that. I guess I can skip tv dinners and snacks for the month and live on ramen, soup, and occassionally mac and cheese? maybe the clinic can help me with groceries. i hope so cuz other wise i'm scrwed.

i have school tomorrow night (thursday) and a doctors appt the following morning. It's going to be really hard to get there by 10am. i hope i don't get sleepy driving.

I think Dawggy is mad at me but I'm not sure exactly what I did. He hasn't talked to me in several days. it feels like everyone is upset with me and i just don't know how to fix it.

i don't feel good. i need to get my kitchen and livingroom straightened up but I get so weak and dizzy when I try to clean. i know its just an excuse. i've always got an excuse and i need to stop complaining and get off my lazy ass and do all the stuff thats expected of me no matter how much i hurt.

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