Harmony and Dawggy are bloggers!

Mkay Looky!

We all remember Sam. He moved his blog and has actually posted a couple times recently. He's the one that got me to start this blog. hehe.


Now Harmony has one.

Then of course Dawggy jumped on the blogging bandwagon. hehe.

Yay.

Haven't been focusing well...

Haven't been able to follow my lists well or do much else. Don't know why. Dont know what to do or how to do it. Just confusedalot latelly. more than usual or something. trying. harmony, and dawggy are helping me lots. samuel is trying but he hasn't been doing too well. sleeping lots.

5:30am

Not really sure what to say. Don't really feel like journaling but I"m following a list. This is on the list. I'll just show you the current list...



1. E2vote/search
2. Purple Journal
3. music
4. node from info from drawer
5. floor
6. ED Article
7. /msgs
8. Bed
9. Gmail
10. Psych nodes
11. Me
12. blog
13. Star Trek Nodes
14. magazines
15. yahoomail
16. Dresser
17. BPW
18. LT nodes
19. shelves
20. computer term nodes

Exhausted

Slept on and off throughout the day.



I ate healthy. Today I have drank a glass or two or three of orange juice. Ate some of that ultra thin sliced turkey that comes in reusable gladware. And drank an XL blazin' berry danimals.
Grandma is out watering stuff.



Magazines people were calling then mom and then mom again....now.

In a little while I have to take Kylee and Dillon home to get money.
Then to Marcie's house whre the four of us are going to walk to the
Carnival.
I'm dreading it. I'm exhausted today. And the sun is so hot and bright.



Marcie has free ride ticket thingys. We would have left already
except mom wants us to wait until the babies wake from their nap. She
said they were overly tired and she finally got them to sleep, in the
swing, in front of the front door. So she's going to call us when
they wake up then we'll go over there. Drop the kids stuff off from
spending the night here, get like $20, and go park the car at marcie's
house and walk down to the church where the carnival is.



I have sunblock on. My eyes are burning. I'm still sitting in my
bedroom floor. When I finally get home I'll go back to my list. I
don't want to go to this carnival but I have not really been given a
choice. If I don't take the kids I'll have to hear about it for like
ever.



Hmmmm anything else? Well I got more music today. A bunch of
randomish songs. Most are good, a few are trashed. Not many got
trashed though.
Mmmmmmmkkaaaay I'll shush for now...

For Samuel, Harmony, Dawggy, Europa, Kermy, Stephanie, Liz, Kevin, Adam, Keith, Missy, and everyone I call "friend"

Thank you for being such a wonderful friend,
and for helping me through the rough times in my life!

Posting from Email

Testing the ability to post to my blog from my email account. I have
never tried this before. Once I know it works I'll prolly use this
option once in a while. Or often. Depending on how well it works and
what options work with it.
Do images work?



Do links work?

E2

Mkay That's all for now.

Got lost

Yet again I had one of my not so good days and got confused and accomplished nothing.



Samuel is sleeping. Harmony and Dawggy are out of town. Missy left to go camping. Am logged into #bipolarworld because thats what they all seem to want but I don't really feel safe talking there so I turned off the blinking and just wait to be kicked. If someone says my name highlighting in mIRC will let me know and I'll go answer.



Going through all my music. Screw that spreadsheet. Whatever. Depressed. Anxious. Lonely. Started my period today. So that ain't helping.



I'm pretty sure it is Saturday. It's 1:22pm now. If Marcie, or John, or Danielle calls I'll go to karaoke. If they don't call I won't call them today. I'll only go if I am told to go today. Just don't have enough motivation to go on my own. If I knew Charles wasn't going to be there I might actually look forward to going but he makes the entire night an aggravation. I just cannot stand him.



I'm on the floor still. Haven't even sat, let alone slept on the bed in several days. Cannot bring myself to get back up there. It's uncomfortable and scary.

More E2 votes

I used all the smilies under the animal category on the Planet Smilies website. Now I'm trying out all their avatars. Why? Cuz I can.



Another vote used: The frog-prince

Slept, showered, napped

Slept on and off throughout the day. Dreamt of Sam. Had a nice conversation with Samuel. Showered. Ate a Lean Cuisine Cheese Caneloni.



Now I'm in #manicdepression and #everything.

I am going to try today to keep track of everything I do, starting at 4pm my time because e2 will help me keep track. I am including what nodes I use my 30 votes and my 1 C! on.



I decided I’m going to keep hitting random node until something I have written pops up. This may take a long time.



My first vote today went to Non-Fat Ginger Vegetable Dip.


Oberheim Two Voice got my second vote of the day.



Third vote went to Pop art



Fourth vote goes to odn, which is a Star Trek node.



Latent edge numbers got the fifth vote of the day.



Okay, this is getting long for my attention span so I’ll post this then come back later to post more.

Today's list and loneliness

Harmony and Dawggy left for the weekend. They are going to pick up her son. He is spending the summer with them. She's excited and scared.



E2/not computer/computer

1. E2vote/search
2. Purple Journal
3. music
4. node from info from drawer
5. floor
6. ED Article
7. /msgs
8. Bed
9. Gmail
10. Psych nodes
11. Me
12. blog
13. Star Trek Nodes
14. magazines
15. yahoomail
16. ?



Samuel has been so depressed and isolating himself lately. I'm worried about him. Unfortanatly I've been quite a mess most of the time myself. Crying and not knowing why. Not able to think. Everything gets on my nerves. Just a total bitch. That's probably why he keeps pulling further and further away. I wish I could make him feel better.

Harmony's new write up

I just C!'d Harmony's newest write up, Behavior Modification. I liked it. I am very proud to say that she is a friend, a mentee, and a mentor. She has noded three times and 2 of those have been C!'d. She's really doing good. Congrats Sandye.

BTW: I did NOT cool her write-up out of friendship. I did enjoy her reaction, but that was not the reason for clicking that C. The reason was simply it was C! quality. =)

Everything is getting on my nerves

I'm in one of those mood where everything is pissing me off. Every noise, every blink, every comment, every little thing bugs me. I want to scream, I want to curse at people, I want to slice up my arms and legs, I want to take every pill I can find. I'm in a terrible terrible mood and don't want to feel like this anymore.



Grandma's tv is so loud AGAIN. She gets onto me about my music being so loud it'll wake the neighbors all the time but my music has never been half as loud as her tv is. And her hacking is pissing me off. I know she can't help it but right now I just want to go wring her neck.



My leg is asleep. None of the songs I turn on are right. Just not what I need to hear. I don't know what I need to hear. Everything just pisses me off more.



I'm sorry for sounding so pathetic. I'm sorry for being the way I am. I'm sorry.



I don't want to be this way anymore.

Lortab

Took two lortab's today. Not at the same time. Ate 4 little Red Barren Cheese pizzas.



I got to talk to Samuel on the phone today but neither of are feeling well today and I was "grumpy" and "distant". I didn't want him to know I was crying. I didnt cry the whole time but was a couple times but he don't know it. Well, he will if he reads this. :/