Sunday, November 23, 2008

general stuff

I'm always hungry lately. I'm gonna have a hard time keepin my weight down if this continues. My weight has come back down a couple pounds since my halloween candy pig-outs though. I'm 172 or so now I think.

I'm so sick of the pain. Every so often it'll hit really bad all at once. EVERYTHING hurts with my back, stomach, and chest being the worst. I have a hard time breathing when this happens. Tears roll down my face and I grope around and take some pain meds and then do whatever I can to try to get a little relief. Half an hour or 45 minutes later the pain will start to lift a bit.

I'm thirsty all the time too. Like ten minutes after having something to drink I feel like I haven't had a drink in many many hours. My mouth is always so dry. Not sure why. Maybe it's from meds but I don't know which one(s).

I have been slowly cleaning and organizing my apartment. Very slowly but it's getting better little by little. I've also been reading a lot. I have several bibles I read, some are more devotionals than bibles though. I've been reading The Dead Zone by Stephen King. I've also been reading a book called Asylums which is a collection of essays on total institutions that focuses mostly on mental hospitals. I've also been going through old magazines and reading any interesting bits before I throw them out.

Mom came over monday morning right after taking the twins to school. She helped me clean my kitchen and bathroom real good and would have stayed and helped more but the twins had minimum day and got out at 11:30am and she just didn't have any more time.

I finished reading the Stephen King book, The Dead Zone, on Tuesday morning. I then started reading the nearest book I saw which happened to be a "Heartwarming inspirational romance" that was a "free gift" and says so on the cover. The book is "Rainbow's End" by Irene Hannon.

I keep getting itchy. Everything will itch and no matter what I do I can't make it stop. My nose and eyes drive me nuts, my back will drive me crazy, and everything else itches too all at the same time til I wish I could just scream or die!

Saturday, November 15, 2008

preparing for inspection

This coming wednesday an inspector from the housing authority will be coming for the annual inspection of my apartment. Been working on cleaning it. Mom is supposed to come over one day this weekend because I tried to open the middle drawer of my nightstand and the whole front of the drawer just came off and she's going to try to fix it for me. She'll have the twins with her though.

I get really easily frustrated and really easily distracted so never really get much accomplished.

Thursday, November 6, 2008

mail then sleep!

I'm trying to stick to a list. Trying to keep occupied and not give in to the desire/need to SI. I'm having a hard time not thinking about SI.

I'm washing clothes right now and listening to music.

The sun is up and I am thinking of brushing my teeth and hair and getting dressed and walking to the mailbox. I hate going outside but I haven't picked up my mail in quite some time and it gets dark early nowadays so I don't have much daylight left once I wake up in the afternoons.


It's about 10am and I've brushed my teeth and gotten dressed. I'm going out to get the mail and then coming back and going to bed. I will set an alarm and try to go grocery shopping today.

Lost the day

I had a doctor's appointment yesterday but missed it along with the rest of the day. My computer is kinda stupid and my G key is sticking and I'm really frustrated but workin on a list to keep busy. I cannot chat. Computer will not work well enough. I'll be tryin to back up my files so I can do somethin about this. The current list is:

1 Dead Zone
2 Stretch/exercise
3 Email
4 Livinroom
5 Bedroom
6 Bath/hall
7 Kitchen
8 Me
10 Student Bible
11 Floor
12 One Minute Bible
13 Music
14 Household Tips
15 Drawers
16 KJV
17 Xmas
18 Journals/Letters/Mail
19 Desk
20 Holy Bible
21 backup computer
22 Clothes
23 Women's Bible
24 Spark
25 Closet
26 Shopping
27 Asylums
28 Blog
29 Myspace/Facebook
31 Surveys/Free/confusedalot
32 Journal
33 Sweeps

Sunday, November 2, 2008

another multi-day post

Working on a list. A long list now. It varies a bit from run through to run through but the current list looks like this:

Pet Sematary
student bible
one minute bible
king james version bible
women's bible
holy bible

Mom came over after dropping kids off at school on Wednesday morning to help straighten things up before Danielle and Karen showed up. She hadn't left yet when Danielle and Karen got here but left right after they did. They sat and talked for just a few minutes and then we went for a walk. I hate the sun.

Spent Halloween doing not much. Watched a bunch of veggietales videos on youtube. I got dressed so that if any trick or treaters came to the door I was wearing something not stained etc and brushed my hair and stuff. Not a single person came to my door though. Lots of candy that I will have to eat all by myself now! I've had tons already. Bought 2 big bags of mixed candies at Ralphs on thursday evening and have already ate way too much of it.

I am almost constantly itchy and don't know why. Itchy everywhere. From the bottom of my feet to the top of my head and every where in between including my eyes, inside my ears, etc. I must be allergic to myself.

At 8:45am on saturday morning I am only on page 53 of 74 pages of Daily Sweeps. Not going to be able to do them all it seems.

I did not finish the sweeps saturday morning and as of 4amish sunday am on page 37 of 77 and that's with a spare hour due to the time change. Have been too easily distracted lately.