Friday, February 13, 2009

busy week


Went to group and after waiting nearly half an hour to be called in the two of us (Mary and I) who are the only ones who still seem to attend were told that we won't be having group until March 3rd and if they don't find more members there will be no more Livingwell group.

Working on long list trying to be productive. Want apartment to be really clean before landlords show up in the morning. The bathroom is clean. Floor, toilet, sink, mirror, and tub have all been scrubbed within the last couple of days.

Sunday morning:

Grandma's sister, my great aunt Betty Jo, arrived last night from Arkansas. She has no electricity at all in her area and will not have any for a month or more. Mom and Dillon went and picked Betty Jo up from the airport while Kylee stayed home to help with the twins. Grandma didn't go because she wasnn't feeling well and it's been cold and wet for several days now with several more wet days forcasted.

Tuesday morning:

I give up on my ipod. It will not let me put anything on it. Every time I manage to get more than a few songs on it it gives an error and deletes everything off of the ipod. I need to see if we still have a warrenty on it. Mom bought one when she got it for me from Best Buy but that was Christmas of 2007. It may have only been a 1 year warrenty. I've spent trying to get my ipod to work for several days and nights now and nothing works.

Thursday Morning:

Went to pdoc on tuesday. cried between there and moms house. got gas in car, couldn't get gas cap on right. picked up dillon from school. kylee wanted to drive so she drove to ralphs and went grocery shopping with me. stupid me locked keys in trunk and had to have mom come down to ralphs and rescue us. eventually after going back to their house kylee decided to come home with me so she drove us to my house and we stayed up til after 4am. we put the groceries away, played wii fit, ate frozen french bread pizzas, played more wii fit, she had a lasagna tv dinner then we watched a jeff dunham dvd til she fell asleep on the couch and i took my computer into my bedroom. we had to get up early and go pick mom up from toyopros. the car dealer is in the same parkig lot and i showed them my gas cap and they ordered one and i came back later in the day and he put it on there and didn't charge me anything. picked dillon up from school again. went to best buy cuz of stupid ipod. they'll let me know when it's fixed. got completely lost trying to get home from there and ended up in norwalk in tears. mom stayed on the phone while i went into target and asked directions and stayed til she knew i was on the freeway the right way. i have a good mom.

i have to get dillon to school at like 8:30am and then pick the twins up at like 11:30am and who knows where kylee's gonna want/need to go. mom wont get her car back til the end of the day most likely they said. another really long day. i slept a little from like 11 to 2:30am or so and have been crying a lot before and since. working on a list now and trying not to si.

I want to give up. I want to stop living. I want to stop thinking. I want to stop being so stupid, so hopeless. I'm tired of the pain. I'm tired of the world.

Friday morning:

I took Dillon to school in the morning then went back to their house and waited for the twins to get out of school at 11:30am. Mom drove my car and we ran to the store and then to the kids school. Eventually mom heard from the mechanic who told her that her car is taken apart and they dont have a part and won't be ready for at least another day. Eventually mom and the twins drove me home and mom cleaned my kitchen while I kept the twins occupied with the wii fit. They left when it was time to pick up Dillon from school. I did a bit more Wii fit to get my 30 minutes. Then I napped. Ate a tv dinner and the last of the cheesecake and then eventually started working on a list.



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