Saturday, June 19, 2004

Grandma is getting to me BAD




I cannot ever please her. I don't mean to be a terrible person. I try to do what they want. I can't. I cannot please her. I don't have the energy. I don't have the strength. With every word that comes out of her mouth it makes it that much harder not to run a blade across my pale skin.





I need her to go away just for a while. Just leave me alone. Right now even the sound of her coughing is making me need to cut more and more. I am trying so hard not to give in to these urges. It's so hard. It's so loud. Inside people make this even harder. I can't deal well with anything. My head hurts. My whole body hurts. I just want to give up. I'm still trying tho. It's so hard but I'm trying for Sam, Harmony, Dawggy, and anyone else that truly cares.

1 comments:

Harmony said...

I'm very proud of you for not cutting bleu. You are a very strong lady and I know you would regret it in the end. Try not to let them get to you the way they do. Don't let them get you down. I wish I had the magic words to make it all go away. Love you.

Followers

Blog Archive